Day Twenty-two: Create a playlist. Sing loud. Dance hard.Yeah, it has been awhile.
The last couple months (omg, I can't believe I left this challenge for so long!) have been interesting. At this point, it has been about eight months since the breakup, and a little less since my ex-partner started dating my friend. So, I'm kind of in a weird place in my healing journey. I'm not as angry, I don't think about my ex-partner very often, and while I still dread seeing them at friend gatherings, it's not something I think about for three weeks beforehand. But, I still get a sinking feeling in my chest and stomach when friends talk about houses and marriage and babies. I still sometimes wish for a time when things were easier (and I don't mean I want him back, I just mean that I wish life was less complicated than it is now). I still think of him when I see a t-shirt he would love or a reference to an inside joke from a trip and it hurts. I still feel the need to protect him when I hear certain things that may hurt him. Some days, I'm really great: I'm happy, laughing, enjoying every second of my life. And other days, I'm really down, for what seems like no specific reason. Sometimes--and for a lot of people--music can really help in healing. When this breakup happened, I started putting a playlist together. But, to be honest, I couldn't listen to it for a really long time. Not until recently, actually. It was too triggering for me. I felt the pain too much. So, I adjusted it. I kept the hurting breakup songs, but also added hopeful songs about moving forward and songs about being an empowered woman. It doesn't hurt as much to listen to now. I do catch myself skipping a lot of the heartbreak songs, still; but now it's not so much because I am feeling the breakup so intensely, but because they apply to my situation less than they did before. I tend to add songs that are sung with intensity and with belting. For me, I have wanted to literally scream in my car during this breakup. It felt like the only way to release this kind of negative, ripping-my-soul-apart pain. But, I'm not really the type of person who yells and screams, even on roller coasters or jumping from high places. So, singing these songs and belting my heart out gives me the same release. It's cathartic for me. So is dancing. So, if you ever pass me in my little silver prius on the highway, you'll likely see me (badly) dancing in my car with Kesha, belting with Kelly Clarkson, and rapping with Cardi--using their talents to heal my soul and heart. Singing loud and proud, Farrah ♥ Edit: In case you're curious, here is my post-breakup playlist. What would you add? (p.s. If you'd like to add it to your own Spotify, I made it a public playlist!) Moving On to Better Things ♡ H8U -Liz Huett ♡ Follow Your Arrow -Kacey Musgraves ♡ Fly -Maddie & Tae ♡ Worth It -Danielle Bradbery ♡ Miss Me More -Kelsea Ballerini ♡ Road Less Traveled -Lauren Alaina ♡ Doin' Fine -Lauren Alaina ♡ Lonely Call -RaeLynn ♡ Little Black Dress -Sara Bareilles ♡ Gonna Get Over You -Sara Bareilles ♡ I Could Use a Love Song -Maren Morris ♡ Make You Miss Me -Sam Hunt ♡ Guilty -The Shires ♡ Never the Bride -Missy Lancaster ♡ Love to Burn -Ashie Noey ♡ Rich -Maren Morris ♡ Somebody Out There -A Rocket to the Moon ♡ I Don't Care -Cheryl ♡ Forgetting All About You -Phoebe Ryan ♡ Problem -Set it Off ♡ Mine -Phoebe Ryan ♡ Shout Out to My Ex -Little Mix ♡ You Don't Own Me -Grace ♡ It Ain't Me -Kygo ♡ Tonight I'm Getting Over You -Carly Rae Jepsen ♡ RIP -Olivia O'Brien ♡ Queens Don't -RaeLynn ♡ Save As Draft -Katy Perry ♡ James Has Changed -Phoebe Ryan ♡ Somewhere On a Beach -Dierks Bentley ♡ Thought It Was Gonna Be Me -Catherine McGrath ♡ Drinkin' to Do -Ryan Griffin ♡ Don't LV U Anymore -Liz Huett ♡ Dammit -Jana Kramer ♡ If I'm Lucky -Jason Derulo ♡ In My Blood -Shawn Mendes ♡ Drink About -Seeb ♡ Acapella -Morgan Myles ♡ Not Lonely, Just Alone -Chloe Gilligan ♡ Your Side of the Bed -Loote ♡ One of the Good Ones -Jordan Rager ♡ Fall in Line -Christina Aguilera ♡ Fuck You -Lily Allen ♡ F**k U Over -The Summer Set ♡ New Rules -Dua Lipa ♡ Goodbye Song -MKTO ♡ Take a Bow -Rihanna ♡ Shake it Off -Taylor Swift ♡ We are Never Getting Back Together -Taylor Swift ♡ Idgaf -Common Kings ♡ Sorry Not Sorry -Demi Lovato ♡ Without You -Avicii ♡ Since U Been Gone -Kelly Clarkson ♡ F**k You -Ceelo Green ♡ Single Ladies -Beyonce ♡ Picture to Burn -Taylor Swift ♡ Miss Movin' On -Fifth Harmony ♡ Too Litte, Too Late -JoJo ♡ Bodak Yellow -Cardi B ♡ No More Sad Songs -Little Mix ♡ Power -Little Mix ♡ Problem -Ariana Grande ♡ Let Me Go -Hailee Steinfeld ♡ Be Alright -Ariana Grande ♡ Ugly Heart -G.R.L. ♡ Getting Over You -Lauv ♡ FourFiveSeconds -Fairground Saints ♡ Fairytale -Sara Bareilles ♡ Didn't I -Kelly Clarkson ♡ I Don't Think About You -Kelly Clarkson ♡ Stone Cold -Demi Lovato ♡ Goodbye to You -Michelle Branch ♡ New Man -Ed Sheeran ♡ Drunk -Ed Sheeran ♡ Ex's & Oh's -Elle King ♡ Love Yourself vs F*CK Yourself -Yo Preston ♡ Praying -Kesha ♡ 15-17 Months -Tiny Stills ♡ IDGAF -Dua Lipa ♡ How Long -Charlie Puth ♡ 50 Ways to Say Goodbye -Train ♡ HOLD ME TIGHT OR DON'T -Fall Out Boy ♡ Real Friends -Camila Cabello ♡ do re mi -Blackbear ♡ Then -Anne-Marie ♡ liability -Tove Styrke ♡ Walls Could Talk -Halsey ♡ Cross Your Mind -Sabrina Claudio ♡ Woman -Kesha ♡ The Middle -Zedd ♡ Curious -Hayley Kiyoko ♡ Just the Same -Charlotte Lawrence ♡ Low -Greyson Chance ♡ You Broke Up with Me -Walker Hayes ♡ I Like It -Cardi B ♡ no tears left to cry -Ariana Grande ♡ Be Careful -Cardi B ♡ Solo -Clean Bandit & Demi Lovato
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